Dear 15 Year Old Me

The Date was November 1, 2018, and I was invited by a fellow blogger to participate in one of those “tags” where you were asked questions to answer and then you were to tag other people to do the same. I did not normally participate in “tags,” but I believed that the Lord wanted me to participate with this one, and so I trusted the Lord to give me the words to say. But the premise of the tag was that, if you could go back in time, what advice or encouragement would you give to your 15 year old self.

My Response

When I was 15, the year was 1965. I was in my sophomore year at East High School, in Akron, Ohio, which is where I lived for 31 years of my nearly 69 years of life. The rest of those years were lived in IN, NC, TN and SC.

When I was 15, my dad went into a mental institution for a period of time. [My earthly father was the epitome of Satan to me, for he was an abuser of the worst kind, both to his wife, and to his five children. I was in the middle of the five.] And, then my mom had to go to work full-time to support us.

So, it was a time of great emotional turmoil for me, and yet there was a short period of peace in there, too, now that my dad was gone from the home. Yet, no one talked with us about what had happened, and no counsel was given to us. He just wasn’t there for a while, but we didn’t talk about it. 

And we didn’t know how long he would be gone, or when he would come back. And, not knowing was a fearful thing, for I was the one who had reported the abuse, at the encouragement of my aunt, who knew little (update: I later learned it was not my aunt but a close friend).

So, this is the counsel I would like to have given myself at that time:

Dear 15-year-old me,

God loves you. I know you are hurting right now. I know you are confused. I know you need someone to talk with who will listen and who will understand, and who can help you make sense of all this mess. And I am sorry that, as far as human beings go, those people are far and few between for you right now. And I am sorry that no human is reaching out to you to help you work through all your emotions and your pain and your suffering.

But I am thankful that you know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, and that you are leaning on him for your support, for your comfort, and for your help through it all. I am glad for you that you don’t have to go through this all alone, for many people do. Not everyone has the faith that you have in your Lord and know such love as his. So, although things are bad right now for you, know that you are blessed, for God loves you so very much!!

I want you to know, too, how very precious you are to me and to God. Even before God created the world, he knew you, and he had a plan for your life. He has something very special that he is going to have you do one day, and it is going to mean the salvation of many people’s lives. So, all that you are going through, though I know it is hard, is God preparing you ahead of time for that very special assignment he has chosen just for you.

For, one day you are going to be standing up against giants, and you are going to face much opposition and rejection, and you will suffer even greater abuse and mistreatment than you are right now. I know that doesn’t sound very encouraging, but please know that this is necessary in order to make you strong, for when that time comes you must be able to stand strong in your faith no matter what opposition comes your way, and this is for the glory of God.

So, know that you are very precious in God’s sight, and that God has made you who you are for a reason, and that through all that you are going through, he is putting within you a heart for him, and a passion for his truth, and a compassion for the hurting and the downtrodden, and even for those who abuse others because they are trapped in sin’s deceitfulness. 

So, trust Him. Believe that he cares about you, and that he has not abandoned you. Know that he knows about your life from beginning to end, and that he is guiding your life in the way he wants you to go. Everything you are going through is drawing you closer to Him, so that when that times comes, you will be in tune to his voice, and that you will be ready to stand alone, if need be, in order to speak the messages to the people God is going to give you.

So, rest in the Lord. All this does have sense to it, although it is a tragedy, for sure, and I feel with you every pain you have had to suffer along the way. God is making you holy. He is purifying your heart. He is making you strong in your faith, and he is delivering you from fear. For one day you will need this strength like you have never needed it before, and it will be there for you, because of God’s grace to you, and because God prepared you all your life for “such a time as this.”

Love you much! Keep up the good fight of faith, and never give up! Me

Why Are You Afraid?  

An Original Work / December 5, 2013

Based off Various Scriptures

Do not be afraid. 

Your Lord is always by your side.

Serve the Lord in righteousness

Before Him all your days.

Those who hate the light

Will not come to the Lord.

They fear their deeds

Might be noticed.

So, they hate the light,

And they embrace the night.

Do not be afraid,

Although your enemy attacks.

Dare to share your testimony

Of God’s saving grace.

Do not fear their threats,

But honor Christ, your Lord.

Be prepared to give an answer

For the hope you have,

With gentleness; respect.

Why are you afraid?

For all that’s hidden will be shown.

What I tell you, speak in daylight.

Let the truth be known.

Do not be afraid

Of those who’ll take your life.

Fear the Lord with understanding.

Trust Him with your life,

And give not up to strife.

Do not be afraid.

Take courage, it is I, your Lord.

Bow before Me; now adore Me.

Oh, why do you doubt?

Listen to the Lord.

Get up and bear His name!

Run and tell the world He loves them.

Jesus came to save.

Give Him your all today. 

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