(An allegory from real life)
About three weeks ago, my
husband and I each had to have a crown removed from a tooth in our mouths, and
a new crown each was put on order. While we waited for the new (permanent) crowns
to arrive, we were each given a temporary crown, which was not as good as the
permanent one. It wasn’t as solid, not as hard. So, we were each cautioned
against chewing anything hard or anything chewy with the temporary crown.
So, we followed the
instructions we were given, and we were careful about chewing anything that
might even be considered hard on our temporary crowns. Whenever we would go to
eat something, we were very cognizant of the presence of this temporary crown
and that we needed to treat it with care. So, for me, I moved the bulk of my
chewing on to the other side of my mouth, and if I did chew on the side with
the temporary crown, I did so with great care, i.e. I babied that tooth so that
I would not break it and so that it would not fall out, for it was not very
solid, and not glued in there that well.
Today we got our new crowns.
And, I all of a sudden realized I could now eat my fruit and nut trail mix,
which I had on hold for three weeks. So, I began to eat some of it, but as I
began to chew, I realized that I was still favoring chewing on the other side
of my mouth, and I was still babying the tooth crown, which had just been
replaced. I then had an “Aha” moment. I realized that in 3 weeks’ time, I had
developed a new habit, which was not like the old habit, and that, even though
I had a new crown, a much more solid one, I was still chewing as though I had
the temporary crown in place.
What I realized in that
moment is how quickly I had formed a new habit, so much so that, even though I now
have my permanent crown, I automatically did what I had been doing the past 3
weeks, without thought. I also thought about the factors involved in developing
this new habit, i.e. what solidified it so that it was now my practice in place
of what I had been doing before. I realized there were two main factors
present:
1)
I was given
specific instructions by a medical professional whose business it was to get me
that new crown, and who knew what might happen if I did chew something hard or
sticky. So, from her expertise, she instructed me in the right way to go to
avoid a broken crown. And, thus, I followed those instructions, and I did what
she said to do.
2)
I was very aware
that the crown I had was temporary and that if I did not follow the
instructions, that there was the possibility that I might break the crown or
that it might fall out and expose the nerve and that I might be in pain or that
I might have to go get it fixed, and also that this was over several holidays,
so there might not be someone to fix it.
So, from this real life
parable (allegory), I learned several things:
One
I realized how easy it was
for us to break an old habit and to develop a new habit so much so that the new
habit was fully solidified, i.e. firmly fixed, and had become the new norm; the
new way of doing things. It took 3 weeks (or less) for me to change my old chewing
patterns to new chewing patterns.
Two
The word “crown” is another
word for “head” which is another word for “mind.” So, this allegory is really a
parable about how to renew our minds so that our minds don’t think the way they
once did, but so they will now think a different way. So many people struggle
forever with their minds giving into sinful thoughts which often results in
destructive patterns of behavior, but if they followed the two-step process,
mentioned above, and they obeyed God, and heeded wise counsel, and if they took
seriously the consequences of their wrong choices, and didn’t do what they had
been doing, but they did the opposite, soon their minds would be renewed and
the old would be gone.
When I got the new crown (the
new mind), the solid one, the one securely glued (firmly fixed in place, which
was solidified) is when I recognized that I now had developed a new way of
doing things that was not like the old way I had been doing things. The old was
gone. The new had come.
And, this is because I believed
the one who gave me the instructions, I took the instructions I was given seriously,
I obeyed them, and because I was cognizant (aware) always of the weakness of my
temporary crown (mind), and of the possible consequences if I did not follow
the instructions. So, I took those possible consequences seriously, too. And,
that was a huge motivation in me getting rid of the old habit and forming a new
one. And, this works with sinful habits, too, if we will put this into
practice.
Three
On a flip side of this coin,
so to speak, I saw the new crown as my new relationship with the Lord, i.e.
like when someone first comes to faith in Jesus Christ. We are given new minds
in Christ, but we still have some old habits that we have formed when our minds
were weak, and that need to be changed. Immediately, as soon as I began to chew
with the new crown (new mind), I was made aware of this habit I had formed when
I had the weaker crown (mind), and so I immediately adjusted and moved my
chewing back to where it is now more evenly distributed, i.e. the way it should
be.
Four
In other words, one of the
biggest factors in the renewing of our minds, and in getting rid of sinful
habits, besides the two numbered above, is that, when prompted by the Holy
Spirit, and we realize that we are reacting or thinking the old way, we need to
immediately put that off, and we need to adjust or conform to the new mind
(crown), which is truly the mind of Christ (crown).
If we, after we are prompted,
continue to keep going the old way, then we have quenched the Spirit, disobeyed
our Lord, chosen the old way of the flesh, instead of the new way of the
Spirit, and we are going to, thus, have consequences from that disobedience which
may cost us our marriages, reputations, jobs, health, and/or our lives, and the
list goes on and on.
Five
Husbands (or wives), if you
are in the habit of sinning against your spouse, particularly via sexual
addiction, pornography, masturbation, romantic flings, extra-marital affairs, and
lusting after others, all of which are adultery against your spouse, and if you
are in the habit, thus, of lying about it, covering it up, justifying your sin,
rationalizing your behavior, and then attacking your spouse when confronted
with your sin, then you need to treat your spouse with the care with which I
treated that temporary crown.
You need to be gentle,
careful, showing her (or him) much care and concern, treating her (or him) with
tenderness and mercy, out of great concern of the consequences of not doing so,
and out of concern that if you don’t that you could break her (or his) heart,
by ripping it out and stomping on it, and thus break your marriage or have it
fall out altogether. You need to obey God’s instructions for how you are to
love and treat your spouse, so that this will not take place. You need to be
diligent in breaking those old habits and to developing new (godly, pure) ones,
if you want to save your marriage.
Know this! If you, after
having received the knowledge of the truth, continue on in treating God and
your spouse with such dishonor, disrespect, and disdain, and if you continue to
stomp on her or his heart, because of your selfish pride, and if you refuse to
obey the commands of God, and you ignore the promptings of the Holy Spirit, and
you don’t care about the consequences, the message you are sending to both God
and to your spouse is that you do not love them, you don’t honor them, and you
don’t care what you do to your relationship with either one of them.
Yet, the Bible teaches that
when we believe in Jesus Christ, we die with Christ to sin, and we are raised
with Christ to newness of life, created to be like him in true righteousness
and holiness (Rom. 6:1-23; Eph. 4:17-24). According to scripture, this should
result now in the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, and us walking no longer
according to our sinful flesh, but according to the Spirit. It should also
result in us obeying our Lord’s commands.
Yet, if we do not obey him,
and if we continue to walk (in addiction; in practice; in lifestyle) in sin, the
Bible says we don’t know God, we don’t love God, and we don’t have the hope of
eternal life with God. Please take this seriously! For, your marriage and/or
your eternity depend on it!
[See: Lu. 9:23-25; Jn. 14:15,
21, 23-24; Rom. 6:1-23; Rom. 8:1-17; Eph.
4:17-24; Tit. 2:11-14; 1 Jn. 1:5-9; 1 Jn. 2:3-6; 1 Jn. 5:2-3; Gal. 5:19-21.]
Oh, to Be Like Thee, Blessed Redeemer
Thomas O. Chisholm / W. J.
Kirkpatrick
Oh, to be like Thee! blessèd
Redeemer,
This is my constant longing
and prayer;
Gladly I’ll forfeit all of
earth’s treasures,
Jesus, Thy perfect likeness
to wear.
Oh, to be like Thee! full of
compassion,
Loving, forgiving, tender and
kind,
Helping the helpless,
cheering the fainting,
Seeking the wandering sinner
to find.
O to be like Thee! lowly in
spirit,
Holy and harmless, patient
and brave;
Meekly enduring cruel
reproaches,
Willing to suffer others to
save.
O to be like Thee! while I am
pleading,
Pour out Thy Spirit, fill
with Thy love;
Make me a temple meet for Thy
dwelling,
Fit me for life and Heaven
above.
Oh, to be like Thee! Oh, to
be like Thee,
Blessèd Redeemer, pure as
Thou art;
Come in Thy sweetness, come
in Thy fullness;
Stamp Thine own image deep on
my heart.
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